What's the difference between Dick Cheney and Obama? When Obama shoots someone in the face it's bin Laden.

What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

Roses are gray Violets are gray Pansies are gray Daffodils are gray I am a dog :)

YOU-why did the airplane crash? (person): why? YOU-Because jimmy was flying it. (person): Who is jimmy? YOU- a fish.

What's hairy and sags? A ball sack

R: Caught my wife cheating the other night. P: You bitter? R: Yes. I am.

Some guy pretends to be Santa on the street. He touches a little girl and says "It's okay i'm Santa" So the pedophile Santa molestes the little girl. The little girl goes home and says that Santa touched her so the parents go looking for this guy. And then they find out he died of a heart attack.

Knock knock! Who's there? Wristwatch! Wristwatch who? Orange ya glad I didn't say banana

What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

Friends are like trampolines, I always wanted a trampoline

What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.

Why did the paraplegic die in a fire? He couldn't get down the stairs.

Knock Knock Who's there? John John who? John Williams.

Your momma is so dumb, she failed the IQ test.

1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

whats worse than a pile of dead babies? two piles of dead babies.

A homeless guy gets done with his daily work. where does he go? nowhere he is homeless...

V I T A M I N C !

A: What is faster than a speeding bullet? B: Light

John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

on a scale from 0 to 100, how childish are you? 69

hard cheese

how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw them

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...