A redundant man walked into a bar. He sat down, and unfortunately, we learn 5 minutes later that his wife died.

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Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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whats white and big and white? alot of things...

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whats black and has many friends? a kind sociable black person

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor, You've been diagnosed with venereal disease.

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Clyde: Hey John! :D John: Hey clyde! :D Clyde: :D! John: :D! Clyde: :D, :), :|, :(, D'X John: ? hey man, are you ok? Wtf is going on with you? Clyde: Man, it's not me... :'(... It's you... It's your... Your... John: My what? Clyde: YOUR FACE!!!! D'X

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Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is your chest, As flat as my back?

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A man walks into a bar, he is then escorted to the hospital as a result of brain trauma.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

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Why was the boy late for class? He was late because he got stabbed and left in the bathroom.

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Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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Whats similar about an elephant and a plum? Theyre both gray, except for the plum

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whats harder than nailing a dead baby to a tree? my dick wile i do it

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A Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They end up getting into a heated argument. After about an hour of back and forth they decide that each person has a valid point, agree to disagree, and go about there business.

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Why did Sally cry at the wedding? somebody shot her future husband.

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Why were the black mans hands all sticky? He was helping orphans with arts and crafts

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If Johnny has 4 dollars and Clarissa has 7 dollars, how many dollars do they have all together? 11 dollars Knock knock Who's There? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny and Clarrisa, all together we have 11 dollars.

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A man walks into a bar He goes to drink away the fact that alcoholism is tearing his family apart and that he lost custody of his three-year-old son that same day

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Hurricane Sandy should be named A-Rod. Cuz he dosent hit anything

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What did the plane say to the ground when they hit each other Boom

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Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops