a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, i, j, k, l, m, n, o, p, q, refrigerator.

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Whats the difference between a person with cancer and breakfast? Breakfast is important

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What is black and white and red all over? A multi-racial orphan who has recently suffered a fatal stab wound to a major artery.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - To rape you. Knock Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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My momma's so ugly she had to get plastic surgery. Now I need it.

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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Whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings? whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 bee stings? No! The holicost Whats worse than the holicost? What? 3 Bee stings

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yeyeyeyeye live action

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What happened when the paraplegic man went into the bar? Nothing the man couldnt get into the bar because the bar has no wheelchair ramp.

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How do you know what to order at a Creole restaurant? Ask the waiter, they are usually familiar enough with the menu to make an educated recommendation.

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"knock knock" "whos there" "poop" "poop who" "poop in the toilet"

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My mom says to me are you gay and i say are you gay (What did i just do)

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YOOO MOMMA LIKE A BIG MAC FAT JUICE AND ONLY WORTH A BUCK!!!!

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i tried logging into my ipad. turns out, it was an etch a sketch, and i dont own an ipad. also, im out of vodka.

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What do you get when Johnson cooks toast? Shit toast.

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knock knock. whos there? the police. we have news about your daughter. She has been tortured and raped and you will never see her again for the man that took her has taken her out of our jurisdiction.

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Women's Rights.

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You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

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how many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? 2 one to hold the latter and one to put it in

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Why do dyslexic people stink at typing? c k j a h s d i u p q h g n z v m n k b e r t y o f This is why...

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Simon says.. Nothing because he is deaf, so therefor he would have to sign it to you.

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I remember this one time... I was sleeping... And all of a sudden... I woke up... Yeah.

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What's the difference between car keys and truck keys? Literally nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops