There are two muffins in a oven, the first muffin is chocolate chip and the second muffin is blueberry.

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How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

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why did jimmy stop eating his breakfast two Penn state officials knocked at the door

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Two muffins are in an oven one of them says "wow it's hot in here" The other muffin says "Ah a talking muffin"

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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why couldn't the girl make her bed? she is homeless.

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If this joke were a potato I would be very confused

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What do silly people in a monastery say? stop munkying around.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

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roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

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find the mistake in this sentence: Sadam Hussein: "hello" mistake: Sadam Hussein said hello!

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating in mid air? Drop It Niggher!

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knock knock no no you go now i clean

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Whats worse then a rainy day? Rape.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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Roses are red violets are blue I want to F%$# you with a rake

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A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

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Vagina (Note: If you are gay just move on by.)

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Why was everyone screaming bloody murder? Their home team won

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what can you say about a midget dressed as a clown? he had a terrible childhood.

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why did the black man attend the AA meeting? his wife told him the only way she would stay with him is if he would attend these meetings, he was an alcoholic and is dying of liver failure.

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What was Dillon's old name? Dillon, I lied about the old name part.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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