April showers bring May flowers! And what do May flowers bring? Bees. Lots and lots of bees.

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You know what sucks ? A vacuum.

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What's green and bounces? An envious kangaroo.

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Why did the black man have blood on his hands? He was a surgeon

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Why does a squirel swim on his back? Because it was trying to keep his nuts clean

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What's funnier than 3 midgets in a treehouse? A talented comedian.

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Cum on guys....gay jokes are mean

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J?????????????????o??????????????????????k?????????????????????????e?????????????????????????????????????s??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????o??????????????????????n??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????y???????????????????????????????????o????????????????????????????????u????????????????????????????????.?????????????????????????????.????????????????????.????????????????????????

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Whats smarter you or the person writing this? -The answer is that i said whats smarter not whose smarter so I am smarter because you had no clue this was point less pie

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Yo mama so fat! She should be concerned because diabetes is a serious problem that can lead to a heart attack. Also STOP EATING MCDONALDS.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?' The horse says "I was just diagnosed with testicular cancer."

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What did the preist say to the other preist? 'hey! we're both preists!'

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How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With floss.

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Why was Martha put in a wheelchair? She was hit by a rabid cabbage.

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i hate black people

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You know what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile where one's alive in the middle, and has to eat his way out.

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Q-what did the bus say to the other bus? A-nothing, buses are incapable of talking

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How long does it take a blonde to skrew in a light bulb? Any amount of time; given that she knows that said bulb is in need of replace meant, or that said blonde is disabled, or if you thought I would make some kind of funny blonde joke that you would tell your friend and then forget ten minutes later, only to think of it a day later and claim it as your own.

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Who would win Coolio or Vannlia Ice? nieth because Chuck Norris did a round house kick.

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People with cancer.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Dave." "Dave who?" Dave holds back tears as he realises his mother's Alzheimer's is getting worse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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