What do you call a baked bean falling from 10,000 feet? A baked bean

Q:Wy could't lily sleep at night? A: Becasue her eays were stappeld open.

What do you do when your archenemy walks up to you? Kill them due to their vulnerability, I mean they walked up to you...

Why did the dead baby cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the chicken.

If an aeroplane falls from 15,000 feet in the air and crashes into and orphanage is it possible that no-one will get hurt? No,the aeroplane will destroy the orphange hurting the property value.

What's brown and rhymes with poop? Dr. Dre.

Decode this; Hetay owcay aidsay oomay. Answer: ummmmm.... Let me think....ummm, does anybody speak pig latin?

A man walks into a vagina. The man, expecting a holiday inn, is very confused, and later gets mauled by five bears, who mistook his scent for a fish.

What do you call a black woman that flys a plane? - a pilot...

A man walks into a bar. He proceeds to get intoxicated and then commits a felony.

Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she had leprosy and had to have her legs and arms amputated

An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Ouch.

What did the octopus say to the squid? Nothing, considering these two species can't speak.

What happenend after the chicken tried to cross the road? a KFC opend

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

Hey! What dhujv hushichk jgdwrggy man? Go home Sally, you're drunk

What's black and Has 8 legs? Gang Rape.

What can make you pee? Liquid

A man called the police and was later arrested for murdering himself,

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

What do you get if you cross a canine and a sheep? A Sheepdog. What do you get if you cross a cat and a dog? You fucking stupid? It cant be done!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

My next door neighbour found out yesterday that I am a serial killer. Knock Knock. [L]

Why did the chicken cross the road? Actually a better question would be, why is the chicken near a road in the first place?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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