If you have 24 hours to live what would u choose to do? I would choose to take stander ised testing b/c it feels like it's forever.

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What do you do on Mother's Day? This is not a joke, I don't know what to do.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, there is no reason for a chicken to need to cross a road.

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Why was the black man smoking marijuana with his friends? He was at a glaucoma support group meeting.

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A man and a midget walk into a bar each carrying a suitcase. They were stopping by after work.

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Q: why didn't johnny do his homework? A:because johnny is dead

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Noideer! No.Blind What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? Still Noideer! No, it's basically dead

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What do you call a room with an oven and ten Jews in it? A kitchen.

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I dont often wash my hands in the bathroom but when i do its so people dont think im gross.

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What did the father say to his son? I'm leaving and I'm not actually your father.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms or legs.

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OMG SOHPIE IS SOOOOO GREAT AT BLOWING Josh Brown xoxo

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'A blonde', 'a brunette', and 'a redhead' are ways of referring to women who have hair of a certain color.

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How do you get a one armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

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What's the difference between a baby and a textbook? You throw a textbook at the wall with TWO hands.

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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what do you do when you see the klu klucks klan ? act white

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Why did the boy cry when he sat on Santa's lap? Because Santa's boner reminded him of his pedophiliac step-father.

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How do you get your clock to stop ticking? Hit it with a sledge hammer.

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How do you cure aids? Jonathon siezed to care as he proceeded to cry when he was told his lemons were over the weight of what he'd expected

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus Why was Billy laughing? He was driving the bus Why did Bobby drop his ice cream? Billy put the bus in reverse Why was Johnny crying? Sally and Bobby stole the money from his bank account and now he is poor and homeless

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Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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Whats Black and White and Red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops