What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

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Q: what did the man with a broken jaw say? A: nnamkkiuuiriwojjkmgfmls!!!!

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

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Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

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Why couldn't the white child dunk the basketball? His legs were amputated and he has been confined to a wheelchair.

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Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? ....Mrs Murray silently returned to her armchair, a single tear rolling down her weathered cheek. Her lonely existence deepened, as she realised the gang of boys had fooled her again.

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Whats worse then the quote "Do it, hit her!" The quote "Do it, Hitler!"

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What did the Dementia sufferer get for Christmas?

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A man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun. Then he returns it and leaves.

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I went to Nebraska and saw a dead squirrel

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? EVERYWHERE

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Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

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There is no joke here, stop reading.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Cut the shit, I'm being chased by a tiger!

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How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

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If you posten bout Kony I feel bad for you son. Cause ive snached 99 children and you pst saved none jesse

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Roses are red Violets are violet Don't know why people are saying they're blue

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? no eye deer! -jpow

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Why did the cookie die Because a fat kid was hungry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops