I tell the Doctor I'm having pains in my chest. He says that sounds serious and admits me immediately to the hospital.

What do you look for in a woman? a pulse.

Two Drunks walk out of a bar. They look down an alley and see a dog licking his balls. The first drunk says" Man, I wish I could do that." The second guy replies " Well you better pet him first."

"The Civil War wasn't won in a day, it was won in a lifetime." -Marc Cruz

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano? Neither has he...

What do you call a man with a gun? An accident waiting to happen.

Last night I had a Chinese By that I mean I abducted some Chinese people and ate them

A man walks into a bar He is STD positive.

What starts with P and ends with ORN? POPCORN

Your mom.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

What's Red and Invisible? No Tomatos

Jinoo walks into a club it's not a club anymore it's a slaying factory

what is green, blue with spots all over? A frog with chicken pox

Hey, i just met you. And this is crazy! But im on bathsalts ! *GAUH* Your face looks tasty!! :D

Why did the cow say moo? Because all cows say moo

Hillary Clinton

What's a Guy Gotta Do? -Usher

What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded

What's better than four dead babies in one trashcan? Nothing. Those babies could have grown up to be new heads of state or even the doctor who discovers the cure for cancer.

How do you starve a black man? Tell welfare to cancel food stamps

What happened when the Texan saw snow for the first time? He said "Oh my goodness this is cool"

What was Helen Keller book called Bsnshsiengwkaisg

a blond walks in to a post... OUCH

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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