What did the guy say when he found out his girlfriend had a dick I don't think we should date anymore, you have a dick.

So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

what did the indian boy say to his friend? I wish you were real

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

What is a life without options.... an optionless life

Why will this joke be the most hated? Because it sucks

Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

How do you get a blind man out of a tree? Yes.

Why did the plane crash Because the pilot was hit in the face with an axe

Whatd the boner say to the limp dick get your head up kid

Q. How do you kill a dumb blonde? A. Shoot her.

Why wasn't the girl asked to the prom? Because she had cerebral palsy.

your birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory

Q: Why is Santa's sack so big? A: Because he only cums once a year

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? I got feathers stuck in my cars grill

A seal walks into a club.

What happens when a jew with a boner runs into a wall? He hurts his face.

What's worse than dying? Dying twice.

A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will you have for dinner? The duck says "quack".

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, orange!

She look like Ms. Universe and I'm bout to be in that black hole

"who you calling pinhead" tell me you know what thats off

What does tupperware and a walrus have in common? they both like a tight seal

How do you make a puppy stop barking? Throw a brick at it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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