Q: Why Did The Family Eat Olive Garden For Dinner A: Because it was a simple way to please everyone but letting them choose their own meal

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

The awkward moment when something of quite awkwardness occurs.

What's gay, has ten eyes and is gay. One D. Kelvin Yang.

What did the little boy get on christmas morning? Cancer.

Youre in your car, and you stop at a light you see a home less person holding a sign that says "Home less and hungry, anything helps." You ask if they want a box of cereal, "No thanks." They replied, you ask why not? "Well, I really just want to go to the movies."

What's the difference between a duck?

How do asians chop their food? CHOPSTICKS! Moral: Yeah that one sucked... ON PURPOSE! Now you dont have to feel inferior ALL the time, you feel equal even though you arent! Ill allow you :D

Me: Knock Knock Mom: Who's there? Me: Jason Mom: Jason who Jason: HOW COULD YOU FORGET ME I CAN'T BELRIVE YOUR ALZHEIMER'S HAS GOTTEN THAT BAD! WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN TO ME BWAAA! *Jason sadly died short after from a bus hitting him*

Why did Helen Kelley's dog run away I'd run away to if my name was. Ughgughgughgiggughfufh.

Why do seagulls fly over seas? Because if they flew over bays they'd be called bagels.

When faced with an impossible question. I like to give, and maybe receive, an impossible, yet endearing, request/answer to the problem. Sex?

What did the cashier say to the customer? You're total is $27.95

whats worse than falling off of your bike? thats as bad as it gets,try to think of something else

Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

What did the owl say when it fell out of the tree? Nothing. Owls don't talk.

Q: What do you call a white man with 5 black men? A: A friendly white man. Q: What do you call a white man with a hundred black man? A: A tourist in Kenya.

Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

Eating a bagel, the man was overcome with disappointment, he thought that he had purchased a donut. He later hung himself.

a jew walks out of a furnace

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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