how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

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Justing Bieber walks in a bar. Everyone shoots him.

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The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

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A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. I'm curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Kinly twins are drunk again."

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac over off a cliff? A Cadillac seats 5

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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