Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

What did one skeleton say to the other? Nothing... Skeletons don't have vocal cords

A man walks into a psychiatrists office, naked but wrapped in Saran Wrap. The Doctor takes one look at him and says, "I can clearly see your nuts."

Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Women's rights.

It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

A group of cows boarded a spaceship and was launched into orbit around the Earth. It was the herd shot around the world.

What do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's pussy.

Are you antijoke.com. Because you are a faggot.

I used to get on Facebook, then someone asked me to save a child in Africa by liking a picture of Jesus or ignore it and go to hell

Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

stinky boner

What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

You know what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile where one's alive in the middle, and has to eat his way out.

A moose walks into a grocery store. He goes over to a cashier and says, "On what aisle are the potates?" The cashier replies, "Aisle 4." The moose went to aisle 4 AND THERE WERE NO POTATOES!

Why don't birds cry when they get hurt, lose a loved one, or watch opera? How the f*** should I know.

your friend is so gay that he cuts of dicks as his part time job. and enjoys it.

What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

A man walked up to a fork in the road. He bent down, picked it up, and continued on his journey.

A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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