How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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yo mamas so young shes gonna b born soon

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A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

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what do you get when you you put a knife in a head? a dead body

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

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Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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what is fun to eat but dumb when its alive? A dumb yummy candy

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

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Who is big and stupid My brother

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knock knock *opens door* WE DON'T WANT ANY!

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What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops