When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

"Whats your favorite number?" "9." "Is it because thats your jersey number." "Thats my jersey number?"

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Whats black and flys out of a car? Pupies stuffed in a bag.

whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere

0 + 0 = 0

Why couldn't Sally ride a bicycle? She doesn't have a bicycle. She also doesn't have legs.

Brain fart

Yanter, Look it up

whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Donald Trump

yo mama just like a toilet, white and full of crap!

What kind of parrot can't mimic human voices? One that's just had it's vocal chords illegally harvested and sold on the black market

What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

Why did the duly oppressed individual where sunglasses? Because the sun was bright.

A walks out of a bar and the joke is cut off by a-

Q:Whats big, red and eats rocks? A: A big red rock eater

DON'T TOUCH MY DUCK, IT HAS A ONE DOLLAR BILL

Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

whats worse than a worm in your apple..? getting shot..

1)Did you hear about the sick juggler? 2)No... 1) He just couldn't stop throwing up!!!! 2)Oh no!! Is he ok?? 1)He's dead. 2)HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA c&h

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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