A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

Q: What's blue and fuzzy? A: Blue fuzz

Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because skeletons cannot live on their own and there is no such thing as a skeleton that can walk across roads without muscles.

No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

How did Bella fly? Very badly.

Your moms so fat, she needed repruductive surgury.

What's funnier than 9/11? Nothing. 9/11 wasn't funny. It was a terrible tragedy, the most tragic in U.S. history. If you think that is funny you are a sick person. By: Logan in South Dakota

Some of these jokes are funny, others are sad.

You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

Knock Knock! Who's there? The doctor. You have aids.

A horse walks into a bar. Just kidding, it's a panda.

Why is the chicken on the road? Cuz he died trying to get to the other side.

Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

whats big fat round and bounces on the ground? a ball and your mum

If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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