"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

thumb_up thumb_down -19

alert('The Game')

thumb_up thumb_down -19

why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Two men were patients at a mental institution. One was named Dave, the other named John. Dave very quietly said, "Hello, my name is Dave, and I have a violent form of phonophobia, so please do not-" "DICK!" Dave promptly strangled John. John had Tourettes Syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why did rhys jones get shot. because he was there

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between celery and a truck?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A stranger pulls up next to a little boy walking home from school. The stranger offers the boy a ride home. The boy says yes, gets in the car, and is driven home as promised

thumb_up thumb_down -23

whats long and black on a black guy slavery

thumb_up thumb_down -23

The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A princess kisses a frog to aquire a prince.. then gets arrested for beastiality.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's similar between the Alabama Crimson Tide and a maggot? They've both been feeding off of a dead Bear for 30 years...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why was the little boy reluctant to approach his father? Because his father was a rotting corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A cow went into a meadow and ate some grass. Some time later he wandered off.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what did the nail say to the hammer? Hit me baby one more time

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops