Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

Why did the elephant get on the roof? To jump in the pool.

So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

Two chinese friends are chatting, and one says ????????? His friend says ??????? After that, the first one says ???????????, and you keep reading this like if you understood chinese.

Mother: "George what happenend to your pet rock?" George:"I dont know." Mother:"Here! I found your pet rock. It was in the same place it was before!"

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

Why did the girls ice cream melt? She was on fire.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours Stolen propety....

Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

Does Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? No, it's a scam.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if it weren't for the women our peckers would rust. By:Jhonny Thomas Spikes & Trenton Thomas Prather

When Hitler was a girl she had hyjenical warts and when she got older she had beast cancer.

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? I don't know.

Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

What's the difference between a prostitute and your mom? Your mom is a well educated lawyer who earns half a million dollar a year while the prostitute sells her own body for an extremely small amount of money.

What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

what cuts the grass on christmas eve and lives in mexico? JP I lied about Mexico jackin it in san diego

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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