What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

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What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

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what's worse than dropping half your sandwich? Getting hit in the face with a sledgehammer

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

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my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

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a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

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Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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A dancer walks into a barre

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

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Why does a clown wear makeup? So you can't identify him to police after he shoves your kids in his tiny car and drives away.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? A second one

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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