What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the user is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

Listen Supervisor, this is Agent Clarke of the GOV and the WHO, I suggest you respond ASAP, I suggest you put set me in touch with either Lady, or Axel Knight right away, this is a matter of your personal security.

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

"i once had a rabbit named socks.he was a funny little fellow until one day he got over excited and...well..." "did he...i mean..you know..did he...?" "what?lose a claw,throw up, sit in a pan of warm water until he calmed down?" "yeah! :)" "yes...but then he died."

Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

There was a a round house with no corners.How many corners were there? 100 ,I never said that that it had to be that house.

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

Bob loves Anne. Anne loves Bob. No one cares.

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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