What happened when the lawyer went surfing? A shark came up and tore his leg off.

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Bugsys back back back again with a brand new track cumming on megs back back back with a new boxing cap cap cap, stealing millions from banks having a wank coz hes a lanky cockney mong

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A man walks into a bar wearing large and baggy pants. The bartender asks him, "Why the large, baggy pants?" The man replies, "Because they're comfortable."

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Your momma is so fat that she decided to begin an exercise program and eat healthy and she lost weight.

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A blind man walks into a bar. I mean a fence.

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Why? Because.

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A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

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What is the difference between being a serial killer and a doctor? I'm not a doctor.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. This poem sucks. I like math!

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whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hello there. I am Elder Young and I with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. What would you say if someone were to offer you peace and happiness through all of eternity?

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What do you call a police officer who kills a black person? Innocent

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why do muslims always turn to their left? Because they don't have their rights.

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How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

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What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

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What do you call a spider with no legs? A spider.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

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I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

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what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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There is a terrorist attack. Muslims are blamed for it.

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What's funnier than New York City? ADAM STOCK! By Logan in South Dakota

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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