Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

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whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is actually a really good question which leads me to wonder why the farmer let the chicken out in the first place.

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Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

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Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

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a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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How do you kill a Chinese hobo Shoot him

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What's white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? A refrigerator.

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Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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jack be nimble jack be quick jack is a parapeligic.....there's no need for more

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Lil Wayne

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Gay people: "Quit calling Justin Bieber gay, we don't want him either."

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Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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