Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

time to spruce up!

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

What's the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The anti-Joke isn't a freaking joke. So stop freaking doing it!

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Chickens are not smart enough to open a gate and avoid traffic at the same time!

Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

A muslim paints Mohammed

if u ever get arrested by cop, just tell the cop this: "No no officer, you got it all wrong. It was only a game. It's called RAPE."

"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is actually a really good question which leads me to wonder why the farmer let the chicken out in the first place.

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...