A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why can't the toucann fly anymore? Because they're extinct

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Bob Saget that is all

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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What do you call a guy wearing a white leisure suit? Mister Rourk? No, you call the dud wearing the white duds.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it's not gonna

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Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

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Why did andy fall down Because his friend pushed him over

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Christanity One Womans Excuse of Not Having an Affair Got Totaly Out of Hand

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Have you heard about the Polish princess? There isn't one. The Polish monarchy was abolished in 1918.

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two peanuts were walking down the street. but one was unsalted...

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What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

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Q: What do you call a cow wearing a hat? A: A cow wearing a hat.

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What's a Mexican's favourite sport? Cross-country running.

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Why did the dish run away from the spoon? None of them ran neither one has legs

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what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

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What do you do when your girlfriend is bleeding? She is probably on her period.

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Where do dizzy cows go? In circles...

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When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a cadilac driving over a cliff? They stole my car :(

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

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What the difference between an apple and a pear One of them is red

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im typing this without looking at the jetviard. I can;t toycg type thar wekk yet

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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