What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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How do you make a clown sad? You kill his family.

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Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

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Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

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djkldfnblfnbofgb

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Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

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I used to think skyrim jokes were funny. Then I took an arrow to the knee.

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How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

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your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

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Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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