What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

Why can't february march Because april may

When life hands me beef, I make lemon stew.

Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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