Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

Why do women wear perfume and makeup? They smell bad and they're ugly.

David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

Your mom is so nce that when you got into college she taught you to be more independent so you could succeed later in life.

Humpty the extreme sized grenade fell off the wall. The universe is now in little pathetic bits.

two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

Do you play piano? No

How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

A guy is at a party and he's really thirsty, so he goes to get a drink. He goes to get some soda, but the line is too long. He goes to get some water, but the line is also too long. He goes to get some punch, and it turns out there's no punch line.

Your mommas so dumb she had to climb a glass wall to see what was on the other side! But the glass was slippy so she never saw what was on the other side.

Where would canada be without nature? still here

Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

if bought jim bought 78 sweets and he eats 68 what does jim have left? diabetes

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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