My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

Why did the kid fall off his bike? His mum threw a fridge at him.

your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

What did the husband say when his wife startled him as she appeared coming out of the kitchen? You scared me.

What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was convicted of murder and rape

What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? He is short and finds it difficult getting from place to place.

Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

Q. How many trees does it take to change a light bulb? A. Trees can't change light bulbs.

How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

How many Pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1. and "pollack" is a derogatory term that could be fond offensive to some people.

Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

what is big white and hurts when it falls on you out of tree? A refrigerator

Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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