Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

Q. What do you get when you cross a bird with a human? A. Arrested.

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

What do you call a dog? A cat. What do you call a cat? A banana.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

Andoni was here

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...