How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

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Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

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Q: The red house is to the left and the blue house is to the right. Where is the white house? A: 3 blocks down from the red house

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Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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What's the worst part about eating a dead baby? It's a tie between the smell, the taste, and the depression associated with whatever decline in humanitsy that has brought you to this point in your life. Overall, it's an outright terrible situation.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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Dylan F is stupid He goes to his cousins house Then falls into a pit Moves on

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 397, IF you have a big tounge

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What do you call a white guy pointing a gun at someone? A member of the United States Army.

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

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What did the rock say to the tree. It didn't say anything, rocks don't talk.

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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The New York Giants

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When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

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I woke up this morning and ran five miles. I am proud of myself for engaging in such a healthy lifestyle.

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An Irish man, an English man, and a Scottish man are standing on the edge of a cliff. The English man and the Scottish man both fall of. The Irish man calls the authorities to alert them of this tragic misfortune.

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Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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