One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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Why did the old man go to the retirement home? The 75 year old man had a 45 year career in pluming and he thought it was a good time to retire after saving enough money to be happy and he could spend the rest of his life with his wife. The retirement home was also not that far away from his grandchildren so he liked the location and the home was also very clean and the workers seemed very nice. But this was just a visit to see if he liked it, he may live there soon.

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Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

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How do you make a dentist cry? Kill all his family.

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http://www.pollsb.com/photos/o/355988-gay_marriage.jpg

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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There was a boy and..........his dad said to go to the store to get his daily thing.........he went to the store and bought it......he came home and said.....HERE ARE THE EGGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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What's black, white, and red all over? And interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

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Why was the dentist sent to jail? Because he committed a crime.

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A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

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How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

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What did the Banana say to the human. Nothing, because bananas are not capable of talking

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Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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