whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man says to his wife, "Honey, sex just hasn't been the same lately." "That's probably because of my yeast infection," replies his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A black man wearing a belt. Oh, he has a shoelace!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Question: What do you call a Black person who cooks food at a fried chicken restaurant? Answer: A chef

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Laughter is the best medicine. Not for cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What have you got there? Hitler's gas bill... Oh.. don't show him that, he'll be furious Whys that? He can't read.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Susie fall off the swings? Because she was hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did little polly fall off her her roof? Because she saw a ice-cream van

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why do black people make the best milkshakes? because they use the finest ingredients

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is worse than stubbing your toe. Being shot

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What do you call an Ethiopian on a food strike? A: An Ethiopian

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Tim: Ya know what was wondering? Paul: What? Tim: Actually, I'm not wondering about it anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops