"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Guest what in the butt

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

thumb_up thumb_down -21

And now a word from our sponsors

thumb_up thumb_down -21

There was a cat and a copy cat. the regular cat jumped off a cliff. How many cats are left? 2 Cats have 9 lives!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by an 18 wheeler Knock knock Whos there not sally

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Yo mamma is so fat that she can fit through a skinny doorway. Actually, yo mamma isn't fat at all, but rather a normal sized woman secure in her weight.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How does a black guy die? Unknown

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Jovan

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. -Are u a grapefruit? NO!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why was 14 scared of 15? 7-8-9

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops