Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

Three ethnic minorities walk into a bar, and each does something involving alcohol that confirms a negative stereotype about his subgroup.

What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

Whats worse than the Holocaust? A second one

Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

What glows in the dark and is really annoying? A glow in the dark chimpanzee

What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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