What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

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Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

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why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the elephant.

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How many elbows does a Jew have? 2

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Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinsons..

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A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Donald Trump

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

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whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

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Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

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What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

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whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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I'm Coming

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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