What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

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you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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What does the kid with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A: arms and legs

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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A blonde, a red head, and a brunette are on an island. Due to the law of averages, this isn't that unlikely or significant.

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Who's Juan? DIS ONE

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The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

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I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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why did the chicken cross the road because it wanted to get hit by a car

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b

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Why do so many black athletes drive black cadillac escalades? Because it's roomy and they deserve to reward themselves after they put in so much hard work trying to be the best player they can be.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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What do you call a leper in a spa bath? Say excuse me Sir (or Madam), I notice you have leprosy, did you know that it is treatable? MDT for multibacillary leprosy consists of rifampicin, dapsone, and clofazimine taken over 12 months. Dosages adjusted appropriately for children and adults are available in all primary health centres in the form of blister packages.[17] Single dose MDT for single lesion leprosy consists of rifampicin, ofloxacin, and minocycline. The move toward single-dose treatment strategies has reduced the prevalence of disease in some regions, since prevalence is dependent on duration of treatment. World Leprosy Day was created to draw awareness to leprosy and its sufferers

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 encountered 7 in the Vietnam War where he killed 6's brothers, leaving him scarred. 6 has countless nightmares due to the numerous visions that reminisce that situation in great deal. Also, 7 had a big hook on his hand, which was very scary.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A watch and a pair of socks.

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what did the sock say to the shoe? Get your tongue off me.

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23 convicts were showering. One of them dropping his soap bar. The person next to him picked it up, and the one who dropped it said thanks.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They all gone.

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If your Jewish, then don't go to Germany.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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