so theres a plane, inside the plane are 500 solid bricks one falls out, how many are left? 499 What are the three steps to putting an elephant into a refrigirator? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, close the fridge. What are the four steps to putting a dear in the fridge? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer and then shut the fridge. It's Simba's birthday, what animal isn't there? The deer. its still in the fridge. a lady is walking across a street, she suddenly falls to the ground why? Because the brick hit her in the face. (:

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A Duck, a Mexican guy and Helen Keller walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What do each of you want?" The duck doesn't respond because is is a duck. The Mexican guy doesn't respond because he doesn't know English that well. Helen Keller does't respond because she is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why do people laugh at anti-jokes? Because of a chemical reaction to a neurological phenomenon that results from the brain's response to external stimuli.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette are on a cruise together. A horrifying accident occurs, sinking the boat and killing all of them. Their deaths are mourned by their respective family members.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What did the chicken cross the road? A: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" is a common riddle or joke in several languages. The answer or punchline is: "To get to the other side." The riddle is an example of anti-humor, in that the curious setup of the joke leads the listener to expect a traditional punchline, but they are instead given a simple statement of fact. "Why did the chicken cross the road?" has become largely iconic as an exemplary generic joke to which most people know the answer, and has been repeated and changed numerous times.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Apple hates Blackberry.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what is sticky and brown a black guys stick

thumb_up thumb_down +3

two japanese men walk into a bar. the first japanese man says “i am japanese!” the second japanese man says “i am also japanese!” the bartender then says “well, hey. i’m japanese too”. the bar was in japan.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the little girl cry? Her mom died

thumb_up thumb_down +3

"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops