A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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Why was the Irish Cop happy to see the Mexican family killed in a accident? Because the Lopez family were a family known for generosity and selflessness. It came as no surprise to anyone who knew Steven Lopez and his beloved family that they were all organ donors and not only that but Shelly Lopez, Steven's oldest daughter had blood type O negative (the universal donor). Officer McO'Brianiganly's wife is dying in the hospital in need of a kidney transplant, doctors have given her just weeks to live. Now, thanks to unfortunate events for la familia Lopez., Officer McO'Brianiganly and his wife can live a long happy life together, just as they always imagined.

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A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

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Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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What's the difference between Timmy and a car? Timmy can be brutally murdered.

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A Polish man walks into a bar and says, "Co za asy..."

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A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

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knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

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JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN WHAT'S THE ANSWER?! WHAT DO YAH MEAN YA DUNNO?!

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The elephant moonwalked. On the moon.

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who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

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What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

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You know what's worse than having friends with a lake houses Not being invited to their lake house...

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What did the famer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?!?!

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A black car pulls up early in the morning and slows down by your house You see him pull a mysterious object out of his car and point it at you, The paper boy tosses a newspaper at you

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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Text this number just cuz 16305208722

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Why did little polly fall off her her roof? Because she saw a ice-cream van

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Two pen state administrators walk into a butt

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says: "I forgot to store nuts for winter, now i am dead."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops