What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

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What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

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Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

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yo mama soooooooooooo fat that she should be concerned of the incressed risk of dibties

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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Yo momma is so poor when she went to the bank the teller was like " you have no money."

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What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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What did one dog say the the other dog? "We are both dogs"

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2 Men Walk Into A Bar, I Forget The Rest.

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How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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Why didn't the plane crash... because of the wight male piloting it

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What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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What's the difference between a prostitute and your mom? Your mom is a well educated lawyer who earns half a million dollar a year while the prostitute sells her own body for an extremely small amount of money.

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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