How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

If a tree falls in the forest, but nothing is there to hear it, does it still make noise ? Yes, because whether the action of the three falling produces sound waves or not is not dependent on whether something is there to receive these waves.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: Why did they bury the Indian? A: Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did Helen Keller name her dog? ruh-ruh-blah-blah-bluh

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

thumb_up thumb_down -10

roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man walks into a bar and orders two shots the bartender then picks up his shotgun and gives it to him

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

All the other kids with the pumped up kicks died in a school shooting.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why did Sallt fall off the swings? she had no arms knock knock who's there not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -10

In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

In Soviet Russia, you wouldn't have a likely chance of surviving because of Stalin's mass paranoia and total neglect for his fellow man.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the woman say when she ate crabs. This smells like my vagina (This women died slowly from crabs)

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why are Mexicans so good at jumping, swimming and running? They aren't. You're just racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got hit y a car

thumb_up thumb_down -10

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Oh you're dating my ex? Do you want my unfinished sandwhich too? And my old shoes? And a couple of my shirts I don't wear anymore? How about a my toys I used to play with? Or my spoiled pickle that's been in my car for about a year and a half after I went to the mall with my friends, we watched a movie, I don't remember which one it was but it was funny, then after that we went to McDonald's and it was the first time I heard of McGangbang and it was pretty good. After that I think we went to Jerry's cousin's house, he was a cool guy until I found out that he likes Tyga, so I ended up never talking to him again.... I went off topic, sorry

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops