A man falls off a building and dies on Impact

What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

Vagina (Note: If you are gay just move on by.)

What do you call a chicken with the head of a shark? A genetic anomaly.

a black man and a Mexican are in the back seat of the car. whos driving the car? their best friend

Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

Why was chuck norris the anti christ? Christianity was being threatened....

Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

What did the black guy get for Christmas? (In 1938) A bruise from the Klu Klux Klan.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Guys holocaust jokes aren't funny Anne-Frankly, I do nazi the point in them.

while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

So a blonde, brunete, and red head are all on the side of the road for prostitution. so a man walks up to the red head with money. she takes it and runs off. a man goes up to the bruenete and hands her money, but she also takes it and runs. so a man walks up to the blond with money and she says "wait...we get paid to do this?"

Why didn't susie use the jump rope She had no arms, replied carl No, susie doesn't like using jump ropes replies the mother

A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

What's the difference between the WNBA and the NBA? The WNBA features female athletes, as oppose to the males of the NBA.

i'm an inbred jew - Barras

In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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