Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

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How did Doris respond to Uncle Monty's innapropriate chewing of her nose, ears and eyelids? She cut his head off, placed it an a saucepan, boiled and seasoned it, and then sold it to the middle east. The middle east were very grateful, and sent Doris a camel's penis as a thankyou gift.

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whats the difference between a phone and Helen Keller? you listen to the phone and you smash Helen Keller on the head with a spiked baseball bat

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A man walked into a bar. He was treated at the local hospital with a minor contusion.

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How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

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Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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why is blake oneal gay? because hes black and he likes peniss in his ass

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Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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Why did the accident happen? The breaks on the car stopped working. Why did the breaks stop working? The driver was drunk.

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When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

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What's worse than depression? Having depression and killing yourself

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What's black and white and red all over? A butler with a stab wound.

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What's worse than failing a school test for Peter? Nothing, because he is asian.

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A whole 'nother.

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so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

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How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

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What do you call two gay guys? People who should be living in California.

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What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

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What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

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Q: Why did Susie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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dallen loves penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops