What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

-What do you call a dog with no legs? -Call it whatever you want, it's not coming!

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

I have an idea! You leave.

What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

Dont be racist be like mario he is an italian who looks like a mexican speaks english and picks up coins like a jew.

Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

ur left leg is cristmas nd ur right leg is thanks giving can i vist

What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

What's worse than finding out your friend is gay? Being gang-raped.

Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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