Q: How do you know what will happen when the world willl end? A: by experience

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did they use the phone as a football? Because it was a phone-ball.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Ok so 3 guys walk into a bar... the fourth one ran.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why is The stop sign bent? Because a ambulance full of sick kids hit it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

catlin: hi Thomas: shut up bich 12 assssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssl;

thumb_up thumb_down -13

In the time it has taken you to read this, a small African child has died.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How did the girl cross the road? --she didn't, she died trying because she was blind and didn't see the sign that said "Don't Walk"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walks into a bar. His family has died in a tragic accident and he is trying to drink down the pain.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did Stephen hawking walk into A bar? He didn't. This situation is impossible considering the fact that he suffers from a horrible condition causing terrible muscular paralysis preventing him from walking.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you get Sally of the swing? Throw a clown at her.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens don't have the thinking skills to reason.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

roses are red hula is hula when i walk in cass i see a big tula

thumb_up thumb_down -15

You're tearing apart, Lisa!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Did you know that Helen Keller had a swing set? neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

if your having girl problems i feel bad for you son, i don't have any.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you get a bent nail out of a board? You carefully pry it out with the back of the hammer.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops