What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the Jewish cross the road? He didn't he died in Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause you touch yourself at night;

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

thumb_up thumb_down -34

DEAD ON KANE ITS BEEN ALL YOU ABD CAOIMHIN

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Q:What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

what is the opposite of underpants? overpants

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What's black and crunchy? CO-Co PUFFS

thumb_up thumb_down -36

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

thumb_up thumb_down -36

The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all broke beyond repair.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What's white and black? Color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

thumb_up thumb_down -38

dallen loves penis

thumb_up thumb_down -38

two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Q:Whats the difference between NBC and the NBA? A: The NBA is the National Basketball Assocation and NBC is The No Body Cares.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

why was there a fish in a fish tank ? because if it wasnt it would die

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops