How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

You sick fiend

Why did the deer cross the road? To cause the car crash that killed my father when i was just 15 years old.

Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

How many people like gang rape? 9 out of 10

Why is bobsledding the coolest sport? Because this is my subjective opinion.

Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A hurt animal that should promtly be taken to the RSPCA for surgery.

shit is shit, even if you paint it purple; its still shit

"Sh*t!" cursed the man. "You're such a potty mouth!" replied the unamused toilet.

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

Chuck Norris threw a grendade, killed 50 people, then it exploded This is a highly improbable event considering no man is faster then a grenade

A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

What is square and grey? A grey square.

timmy has no arms knock knock whos there? NOT TIMMY!!!

Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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