roses are red violets are blue you little stupid a*s b**ch i aint f***ing with you

Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

Dan walked into a jelly fish

Why was the minority crying? He had something in his eye.

Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

Why did Sally failed gym class Because she couldn't do push ups

Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

What happend to the dude who couldnt fart He blew up

A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

what happened to the man who got hit by a truck driven by Obama? he died.

A jew walks into a bar He receives a phone call and promptly leaves

What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

Why is adam jackson so black when his parents are white? their was alot of black dick up their during the pregnency. (once you go black, you NEVER go back!)

Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

I'm at a payphone. Though I'm out of change so I'm unable to call my girlfriend and break up with her.

what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

How is a woman like a condom? They are not. A woman is a human being and a condom is a man-made rubber object used as contraception in sexual intercourse

What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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