Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the other kids at recess? I chopped her legs off.

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Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

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What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, the enslavement of blacks over hundreds of years.

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Q - Why did the baby spit out his dummy? A - Because i stabbed him.

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Knock Knock No solicitors

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's dead.

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Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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A Chinese, American, and German were all on the a boat sinking off the Border of the U.S. So the American called the U.S Coast Guard and they were rescued and taken to a nearby hospital. Two of the three members are still alive today and haunted by the memory of that day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares

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Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: One is a human while the other is an unidentified flying object.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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Q: why did the black guy die? A: he got shot

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there once was a chicken it was yellow

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I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

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What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Erm Wait why would a chicken be on the side walk in the first place?

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Why do girls think they deserve the very best? Because if an ugly girl in twilight can find a hunky vampire and ripped werewolf why can't they. And let's not forget those crappy Disney princess movies.

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What did the African-American toddler from Compton get for his birthday? Most likely nothing, seeing as his father left his mother briefly after his birth, and his mother uses all of her money to feed her heroin addiction.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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