How did the man die? He was killed alive.

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I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

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A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

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Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

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How did the guy fall off the roof? He was pushed

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Why are you gay? Because ***** you

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the parolympic games? Having two legs!

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

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what did the kid with no legs gat for her birthday? A soccer ball! I feel bad for this young girl.

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

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Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

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Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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