How can you tell a baby lost it's voice? It doesn't scream when you staple it to a ceiling fan and turn it on.

What did the doctor say to the seriously ill patient? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Why did Bob fall off a cliff? He had an epileptic episode.

A Black Child just received his ivy-league diploma and hugged his dad.

Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

A boy's parents buy him a Wii for Christmas. The boy hangs himself the next day because you need arms to play Wii.

Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

Please ignore this statement.

What did the woman say when her boyfriend asked her to marry him? Idk my bff jill.

What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot was a potato.

What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

What's the difference between Christians and Jews? The Holocaust. The Holocaust is the difference.

What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

Want to know how the dyslexic man with no left arm and no left leg? All left

Ben Wuz here was the funniest Hahahahaha

okay so three men are in a plane ( this is the type of plane you can open the windows) so the stewardess goes up to the first man he asks for a gun she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window he confused but he does it anyways the stewardess goes to the second man he asks for a beer she agrees but he has to throw it out the window hes confused but he does it anyways the stewardess walks up the the third man he asks for a pack of C4 she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window without hesitation he gets it and throws it out the window. so they land and the first man sees a women crieing i was walking down the street and got hit in the head by a gun and arested for being armed the second man sees a hobo cheering loudly hes says he was sleeping in the ally and it started raining budlight the third man shes a women hysterically laughing she says i was going to work and spilled my coffe then my house blew up!

What happened to the teenager who was raped and murdered? Who knows? They never found the body.

Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...