Why did the alcoholic stumble into a bar? Because he was bleeding profusely and was desperately seeking a telephone to contact the nearest hospital.

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roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

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What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

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feminism

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I've got some good news an some bad news. The good new is that you just won 10 million dollars! The bad news is I'm just kidding.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

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Knock knock I'M IN THE BATHROOM !!

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Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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You're mama's so stupid, she decided to go back to school and finish her degree in Russian Literature to improve her self-esteem and maybe -- just maybe -- save her marriage, which had been on the rocks, mostly due to her intolerable self-loathing.

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What does Pluto and a creamsicle have in common? Neither of them are a planet.

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Why did the plane crash The pilot, being an uneducated pilot, crashed the plane as he didn't have proper training, and the whole of the passengers died.

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what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

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what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

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what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

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The Below statement is an antijoke. The Above statement is a joke.

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A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

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If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

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Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

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Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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