Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

Why did the chicken cross the road? Systemic oppression.

Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

What do you get when you cross a taco with a a bungee cord? An inedible taco.

Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

Q: why does the man like men? A: because he is gay

Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens don't have the thinking skills to reason.

So theres a Black guy, White guy and Mexican guy all sitting at a bar. They were friends.

Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

If you see a person falling down your balcony, Say cya later!

knock knock. who's there? 9/11

Your Mama's so fat she can't fit into a toy car!

What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

What did the starving african child get for his birthday Ebola

what starts with f and ends with c k....???? FIRETRUCK

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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