Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

Roses are red Violets are blue Not all poems rhyme Penis

Q:Whats worse than stubbing your toe? A: Watching a terrorist saw your dads arm off.

how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

Faithful men.

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jim Come on in!

What is your name? My name is Jeff

What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

"Why did Suzie fall off the swing?" "She had no arms." "What did Suzie get for Christmas?" "Cancer." "What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a tub of dead babies?" "I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage." "What did Suzie get for Christmas from me?" "My tub of dead babies."

A young boy walked into a hardware store and asked for a long weight. Luckily, the shop owner was kindly and brought the child up to speed on the process of hazing.

Whats worse than losing your entire family in a car accident? Luikimia

Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...