Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she had no arms... Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

There was a girl who had a dream of becoming a famous movie star. So, after five years of hard work and dedication, she didn't become a famous movie star. Dreams don't always come true. Refrigerators keep things cold.

Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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