What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?? Cause he got hit by a bus.

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and an erection? I dont have a Ferrari!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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