The doctor told a man he had aids. He told his friends he had AIDS so his friends wouldn't sleep with his wife after he died.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks: dude, what happened to your eye? The man replies: abuse.

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

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Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

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why didnt the guy go to work one morning he died in a car accident

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A redhead walks into a bar. The bartender asks him if he wants a drink. He says yes.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctors? It didn't because cookies are Inanimate and are incapable of mobility

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How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

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What did the plane say to the ground when they hit each other Boom

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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Two cows in a field. One said, "Moo!" the other said, "Shit! i was going to say that."

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What funny about AIDS nothing its a terrible disease

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

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what's the difference between your grandmother and a dead squirrel? Technically, if you burn them both, your grandmother will produce more ash, but apart from that, they are both useless pieces of carbon.

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What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone? Nothing

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Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

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Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

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Why did the jew kill himself? He heard a raciest joke and went into a period of depresion causing him to lose all will to live.

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Oooh. That fish smells delicious.

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A rabbi walks into a bar mitzwa.

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A man walks into a restaurant and asks a waiter, "Do you serve crabs here?" The waiter says, "Certainly! In fact, stuffed crab is today's special."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenic, and don't have any friends

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I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops