A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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why did the man fall off his unicycle? because he was dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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A horse and a group of people are the jury in a courtroom. They are expected to vote yay or nay of whether a supposed robber is guilty or not. The jury goes into their room. They come out, and the people vote yay. The room turns to the horse. The horse states his objection very thoughtfully, and then leaves the room.

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Q: Why does the man smell so bad? A: He doesn't shower

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On Wednesday night, a drunk man was walking on the cliffs of dover. his funeral was saturday.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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What do you get when you cross a vampire and Adolf Hitler? A socially unacceptable and awkward hybrid of two unrelated, technically dead things.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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Your'e probably not going to laugh at this joke, it wasn't made to be funny

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Why was the boy sad? He was harassed by his mum who died in the 1800's and went into a depressive state in which he drove himself to death using a pair of pliers and a rechargeable battery. No, he really just stubbed his toe.

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You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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Why could'nt Ray Charles read: He was black

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What did the asian boy's parents say when he came home with a report full of b-pluses? "You did well, but try harder next time."

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What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

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A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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