Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

Next season on teen moms, Justin Bieber tells her story.

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

I put children on a leash and store them under my bed. I feed them bird food and they drink eachothers urine.

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

Whats similar between an apple and a black guy there is no similarities between them

What did the dog get for Christmas? euthanization

Why did the christian go into the church? To pray.

What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

Why couldn't Billy write his own name... ...because he was wearing purple lemonade???

I'm on the Seafood Diet. I eat seafood to replace fatty red meats, in conjunction with fruit and vegetables.

What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

Roses are red, violets are red, sunflowers are red, HOLY CRAP, MY GARDENS ON FIRE!

Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

your mother is such a nice person that most people enjoy her company

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

V I T A M I N C !

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed off his entire family.

If I had xray vision I'd go to a black jack table and when the dealer dealt everyone there cards I would look at the hot girls boobs

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

Why was Jimmy upset? Someone kept pouring liquid nitrogen on him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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